Chance the Rapper is not your typical contemporary hip-hop and R&B artist, mostly because of his transparency about his personal struggles with addiction, poor mental health, his upbringing in Chicago and the importance of family successes in his music. On his social media, he shares pictures, videos and moments with his family, including his beautiful daughter Kensli. And “The Big Day” speaks to his joy as a young Black man from Chicago marrying his sweetheart, with songs like “I Got You (Always and Forever)” that is about his love for his wife or “Eternal,” a song that speaks about the value of monogamous relationships.

However, the main focus of the album, the wedding between him and his longtime sweetheart Kirsten Corley, was not well received by critics. In Rolling Stone, a reviewer blasted it as an album with “about as much tonal variation as a leather-bound wedding photo album.” Similarly, Pitchfork reviewers seemed somewhat unenthused by the project, noting that it “amounts to everything and nothing at the same time.”

But nobody should be surprised about the focus of the album, especially given Chance the Rapper’s deep devotion to his family and his faith. He is not breaking character or style in the album. The better question is, why does that topic rub everyone the wrong way?

Although the idea of Black love, marriage and loving relationships is not new, most men in the music industry have not sung about or celebrated being in love with their wives. The mention of women by men in the music industry has been done in a way that sexualizes and objectifies them — not celebrates the love that they share together. Close followers of Chance the Rapper over the past four years have seen through his music and on his social media that he does not fit the typical male hip-hop and contemporary R&B artist archetype. Especially given he is just 26-years-old, he has shown himself to be nothing less than a person who is constantly changing, learning and growing.

The issue is that consumers put artists into categories. We have expectations for what we think they should be, which puts limitations and pressure on them to be a persona. This creates an image that allows them to put out music that sells, but prevents them from being their authentic selves.

But in order to grow as a community, we need to allow room for more diverse Black male artists that don’t fit the fixed image of the stereotypical hip-hop artist. We still have work to do normalizing Black boy joy in and outside of the media and in the Black community as a whole.

When I say tribe, I do not mean the problematic anthropological term typically used to describe nations and communities in the motherland of Africa. I mean finding or creating a community of people that you connect with. Your tribe. How do you find your tribe? You find your tribe by reaching out to people. Don’t sit around thinking people are going to fall into your lap because things do not work that way. You need to be open to meeting and interacting with new people. Maybe that means attending a GIM or talking with someone from your class. Whatever it may be, going in with an open mind will make a huge difference.

I understand the idea of reaching out can be scary, but are you afraid of reaching out or are you really afraid of being rejected? Fear of rejection is real. It can prevent you from going up to someone and having a conversation, and that is okay. It is okay for you to be afraid. However, it is not okay to allow that fear to prevent you from creating meaningful connections. In all honesty, you probably are going to be rejected. You will be upset about it, but you will get over it.

Don’t allow rejection to devalue you. Your value will never be determined by how many friends you have, or whether or not you are accepted by others. Your value and self-worth will always be determined by how you see yourself and the love you have within yourself, for yourself. Besides, every rejection you face will only make the moment when you are accepted and make a connection more valuable.

You’re probably wondering, what about my social media? Although social media has played a huge role in keeping us connected, it prevents us from connecting with one another in the real world. We tend to turn to social media in moments where we need a listening ear or support, and even though we do get the support we need, it does not prevent the inevitable feeling of loneliness. We feel it when we need a shoulder to cry on or even a hug and there is no one physically present to give us one.

I get that our generation prides itself on being “self-made.” We preach “I don’t need nobody” while having an “I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T” mentality, in the words of Webbie. But when are we going to own up to the fact that we need a tribe?